Physical Labor

Sometimes you have to step outside of yourself, and just physically exert yourself, having something tangible at the end of the day to have started, or completed that makes life a little better, if even in a superficial way. Chair progress almost done

Working on a homemade fermented Gingerale, I will post the recipe once success is achieved, i have just begun the starter of sugar, ginger and water, the whole process will take 2 weeks, i am excited. Stripping the coffee table, and a little disappointed in what I found, oh well, maybe a repaint instead of a stain. Reading Reading Reading, napping, gazing at pear tree buds, sparrows, and orange sunsets through my bedroom window, in late afternoon. Using the hell out of my juicer. Being a better housekeeper, is keeping my mind a little less cluttered. Planting here and there. What are you working on? What gives your monkey mind a rest?

Pieces

Stringing together fragments and pieces while looking for wholeness. Gratitude for Breathing fully Sleeping through the night for the first time in (2) months Mid Afternoon dozing to the hum of the mower outside, and a very vocal owl Sun streaming across my room through branches and landing on my face Reading beautiful words and sharing beautiful pain from "A Journal of Solitude" May Sarton. Filling my body with fresh natural food to nurture and counter the strong steroid and anti-biotic I am on, a different kind of breathing. Tell me about your fragments and pieces, I would love to hear about the pieces you grasp onto to sustain you.

You are already Home

What I read this morning, and so needed to read at this moment. It voiced where I am in this moment. It was from Awakening Shakti author listed below. Why do you wait? There really is no point (anymore) to these veils you hang between you and this world. I'm not asking you to answer that question. In fact, the analyzing, trying desperately to figure out "why?" is one of the ropes that has wrapped around you and pulled you deeper under ground into your dark comfortable loneliness. It's a trick you play on yourself. "If I watch myself watching the world from this safe place long enough, I'll be able calculate the distance form here to there, orient myself to this and that, then draw a map of all of it. THEN, when I've memorized the map, I'll make a plan, I'll figure out the various entry points, noting my emergency escape routes, THEN I'll contemplate how to begin my journey." It is simply exHAUSting. So there you sit, in your analysis paralysis, spinning off into goddess knows where when ..... Here is Here. (How could it be anywhere else?) You are You. (Stop trying to be anyone else!) You are already Here. You are smack center where you have always wanted to be. You are already Home. ~ Toi Lynn Wyle

Leo Moon

Oh you fierce LEO Moon. Last night such a beautiful Orb.

Barefoot in green grass, this moon pulled me in and swept me up. The fairies joined as well

A re-do and Sticky Stuff

Hmmm! Firstly the sticky stuff, the stuff that keeps you quiet and scratching your head, and holding your heart. I need to make up with someone, and by make up I mean I can never go back and fix it, and i cannot do what they want me to do with my life....Because honestly I am a complex person, in that I kind of find comfort in my dark corners, and that makes a lot of people, namely people that mean everything to me worried. Worried I suppose that I am settling, that I am not living the life they saw for me???????? At any rate the make up, is really sticky because you see, I cannot breath without these loves, and I cannot stop being me either. I just have to be less me in their presence. Does any of this make sense?? I am such a flood of emotions, I am thrilled because we are finally coming together, a healing of sorts is taking place, I hope. I am a little sad because I mourn the before fall out era, I am a little angry because I have to walk lightly and watch my words, until this tender thing heals, and maybe for ever with them. I love them, I need them, the inner conflict goes on, and as much as it goes against what i am trying to accomplish in my journey, i will meet them where they are, and I will honor them, and their truth, and my responsibility for them.

On a lighter note a Re-Do, a rusty, dirty little thing for $6.00 at a barn sale. I cannot wait to have my way with her. I have already started the cleaning and sanding. I can tell you that the rust will stay. I love rich wood, but this girl is getting a bleached wood stain grayish in tone, to highlight all of that rusty mechanical goodness from the 20's or 30's. I will need to decide which fabric she will wear. I will show an after shortly. I am sanding, cleaning, and being very impatient. Happy Valentine's Day Love. I cannot wait to participate in Sage Goddess Full Moon Ritual this evening.

Finding my Joy

Joy was the word I chose for 2014. There are more that I want to live by, and work through for 2014 but living in joyful moments is necessary for me now. I need to find and acknowledge joy in even the most fleeting of moments, create joy. My goal is of course living in the moment, showing up. I will acknowledge here my joy in the small and not so small, as a prayer of gratitude. As I said in my last post, i am working on creating a healing, sacred, thriving space for myself and my home. It is my meditation room/office?? It is a work in progress, but right now the colors, and the pieces of things I treasure are giving me peace and Joy! That last pic is the before picture, of my gloomy office. I feel like i can breathe in here now, and i feel held in here. Still working on making it very special. I would love to see or hear about your sacred space, or you plans for a space. I think we can carve out any small space and just claim it, I plan on doing this around my home.

Healing Space

I have been obsessively creating my office/meditation space,and it is almost complete, well never really complete, but rather ready. Ready to nurture, heal, and hold me. Last night I participated in Sage Goddess online live full moon ritual, and what a treat for body and soul. The Wolf Moon was beautiful last night with a warm glow. I do believe however it was contributing to a lethargy and physical heaviness i was feeling yesterday and last evening, all week really, just pushing myself slow and steady with the help of DH to make my space right. I bathed in my primal sea detox clay, salts, kelp, essential oils. Drank lots of water, lit candles, incense, sage, and annointed with Lavender essential oil. I felt warm and embraced in my little healing space. The ritual with energetic and powerful, I believe the energy we shared created healing in each of us, and anyone in our thoughts, hearts, and spheres. I am coming along, my space is coming along, there are still things to do, and there always will be. I brought in things i had held onto that were waiting for a space, i painted my walls a vibrant yet warm green, with accents of turquoise. I bought what I refer to as "Groovy Buddha" at an estate sale a few days ago, when I saw my 60's 70's retro Buddha I thought I would paint him, but just cant, the thought and care someone putting into making this ceramic buddha that many years ago is sweet, with his orange peely paint, silver accents, for now he will remain unchanged. I still need to bring a rug, some special art, etc... but I will post a pic of where I am now on the process. The desk will get a remake, i am attempting to recreate the look of a zinc top, my office chair will get recovered in vintage burlap coffee sack, my mother is recovering my pouf. Coming along. Have you created your healing space?