Wednesday, May 22, 2013


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I have been struggling lately, in several ways. I feel stuck, and overwhelmed. I know what I want and need to accomplish, but I seem to only see the road blocks and obstacles. It has left me overwhelmed and frustrated. Time is ticking, i have deadlines to meet and goals to achieve that I feel are critical. I turned to my old friend, Journeying for some help, for an answer. I needed help to see what is blocking me up, and how to get to where I need to be. I know a lot of my issue is still scarcity thinking, and holding on so tightly to comfortable things that do not serve me, and it is not allowing me to take hold of my now, my future, and the path. When I had the journey, like many times, I rarely completely understand it, in the midst of it. Only when i come out of it, and marinate does it hit my like a ton of bricks, and it blows my mind and holds my heart every single time. 

When I arrived on my path in my journey looking for more animal medicine. I was met with a rather typical path, on a steady incline. Walking and waiting for my guide. Instead of a guide. What I got was all of my previous guides, just showing themselves, and telling me to remember all of the medicine and lessons I have been given previously. They were all there, Deer, Bear, Owl, Snake. 

I reached the precipice at which point I was looking across a valley, and to a mountain beyond, I was told that I must go to that mountain, and out of frustration, I said how? how I am supposed to get there. Do I somehow get down this drop off, and then walk the valley, and climb that mountain, and about that time. I immediately knew the answer, and I immediately leapt off the edge. When I leapt off the edge, I was in Eagle, I was actually an Eagle. I surveyed, and flew, and glided, I saw a mouse way down below. I swooped down and caught it in my claws. 

Soon after I smelled the roots from the tree I entered through, and knew it was time to return.  I came out of it, and immediately thought that I need to honor all of the medicine I have received, and never forget the information, the validation that I have received. It is so easy to do. 

It became clear to me when I realized what the Eagle represented. That is what is holding me back, my doubt, my fears, my scarcity thinking. Looking at all of the obstacles, and perhaps feeling not worthy and not capable of the abundance and prosperity I want in my life.  

I need to take the leap and soar knowing that it will be what I need.  

When I looked to see what Eagle Represented 

The Alchemic Interpetation : A representation of prime matter, the start of an alchemic operation (there is that word again in my life) The Eagle spreads its wings over the step into creation and fans the fire, encourageing growth and new matter. 

If the Eagle takes to flight it may symbolize your ability to rise, or be lifted out of a situation or depression.

 The Eagles Message:    Defeat your fears and see beyond the horizon. Have faith in your purpose and see how all things, good and bad, fit into the picture of your life.    

And ultimately  "Not Allowing The Illusion of Limitation to ground us in our flight" 

I really love that. The reminder that our limitation are only an illusion. Now to work that magic into my life. 

I think most of us experience this illusion on a regular basis, perhaps every sing bit of it is an illusion. What are your thoughts? 

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

That Deep Pool

Mothers Day was spent with my daughters, my mother and my sister. It was a day of deep gratitude where I fully felt the deep pool of love and connection of our very different but interwoven spirits, and the magical energy of that. We laughed loudly, cried softly while bearing hearts without hesitation. We hugged, whispered, teased and understood our bond can be tense but it is always strong.  My husband has a wicked sense of humor and that morning I felt a little more sensitive than usual, I said where is my Happy Mothers Day, and he said in a joking way "Your not my mother"  I kissed him and went to spend my day with my women. When I arrived home, he said you know I was joking this morning don't you, because you did raise me, nurture me, tolerate me, accept and loved me, you mothered me in the best way, and I thank you for that.  A sweet end, to the sweetest day.