Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Rest In Peace Grandma Betty

My Grandmother passed away, on Sunday August 14, 2011 at 83 years old. Let me start this, by telling you that I love my Grandmother, I say this first, because what I say next may be shocking and make me sound like a cold uncaring person, but you just had to be there for the ride to understand. My Grandma Betty, her death was not really a surprise, she has been in the nursing home for a while, and her health has been going down hill lately. My G was a character, and not always in the best way, in fact usually in the worst way. I could tell you story after story of her sharp tongued ongoing barage of negative things, constant complaint and whining, that sounds really terrible, but I am trying to tell it like it is, I am one of the most tolerant and forgiving people you would ever hope to meet, but to witness are big part of her life, it has been amazing. I will say that to give you a clue, that while standing at my grandmothers casket along with other family members, my uncle, my mothers kid brother (who took the brunt of my grandmothers observations) stood over the casket, welling up, and said before everyone there, to my grandmother " Your were so, so mean!" long pause, but I miss you. I think that sums it up.

I understand that my G did not have an easy life, I understand that she likely never got what she wanted, that she felt cheated in a way, that she was bitter, and angry and a fighter.

What I also understand, as most people do, is that we all have a choice, it may not feel like it, but we do, we all have burdens in life to take on. I have had a pretty hard life myself, but I will not let it, stop me in time, and wallow, and blame, and hate.

It was my choice, my life. Just the one in this space and time. I must learn, and accept that my pain, my grief, my joy, my love, is my own, it is no greater, and no less than anyone else's. I hope that when my G mother ascended, and I believe that she did, that she felt, or became aware, that she was loved, that we were always there, and that no degree of discomfort that she caused pushed her family away, as many would have, and that speaks volumes about the people that stuck it out, mainly my mother, she was always there, always giving, always being vented on and at.


Thursday, August 11, 2011


My life has been a little surreal as of late, but in a good way, I think!. My baby and I are pretty private people. Our home is our sanctuary, and we rarely have people over. We decided that we have to be more social, dont get me wrong, we like being around people, for the most part, but we dont really entertain. My baby is the life of a party, he is a light ball of energy that lights up the room, and people gravitate to it like a moth to flame, I am the balance of that in the calm, quiet, introverted one. We are opposites, but it works. Again, as I do most times, I digress. We recently met some new friends, believe me it has been a while. It is really too long and complicated, but we just havent made couple friends, even though we have been married for over 12 years, because I think we are so different from each other, that actually finding a couple that we both click with is very difficult. My baby met some very interesting people a few months ago,while out of town at a trade show, and he really hit it off with them. They are now at our home, because they do trade shows as well and wanted to try some in our area, we invited them to stay at our place and plug in their RV. We have plenty of space in the country. It has been amazingly rewarding to connect to these two very unusual lovely people, very good guest. She is Russian, and a gypsy at the moment, she is a very talented pianist, and singer, composer, she has toured and performed in concert halls, and taught college. He is very energetic, innovative, creative, funny, guy. She brought her piano to store in our house, while she stays with us and looks for a place in Hill Country. Our evenings are spent at times, with the guys having a ping pong tournament outside, while she plays classical music on the piano, on my porch. I guess we just had to find the right space cadets, to click with.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011


While No One Was Watching

Wow, (6) months since my last post. Life is really odd, and too wierd for words sometimes. Mine anyway. The dilemna possibly, is that sometimes, the things in my life have nothing to do with Simple Living, or making, sometimes, it's very unexpected and complex. Is it better to stay off subject privately, and not post, or post it because it is signfigant. To catch up, perhaps another day. I have made my soap, body butters, hand balms, and I love them, I have done a couple of shows, developed packaging and my company name. I am very proud of the product, but need to step up production. I obtained to wonderful little buddies, a male pygmy goat, and a male dwarf nigerian goat, sweet, sweet sweet. Who knew goats had so much personality and affection.

I have 2 now, but I am ready for more, maybe a female, we are taking our time, I dont want to have a full fledged breeding herd. Planted my garden late, but I am getting some really beautiful squash, now come on tomatoes, and bell peppers. I will be lucky to get anything, with over a month of 100 + days. In my next post, I will be discussing : Limoncello, Lemon Curd, and Craiglisting efficiently.