Anxiety

Wow, I am so unprepared this year, what in the hell happened, wasn't it just August yesterday. Thank goodness, my mother stepped up and will have Thanksgiving Dinner at her home. I have not bought one Thanksgiving food item, nor have I bought one gift for Christmas. All of the blogs I love are in full swing, and not only reflecting on the season, but already deocrating for Christmas. I need to catch up, but I think maybe I need to slow down at the same time, I mean what is the point if you cannot get some enjoyment out of it. I will accept my shortcomings this year with regard to the Holiday, and accept that indeed I missed the mark for Thanksgiving, but that Christmas planning is still salvagable. This has been a whirlwind year with a lot of change, for myself and people that are the closest to my heart. It is necessary, and joyous, and painful. It is so many things, but things that remind you that you are alive. The last two years, have been this way for my family, but my family has grown more in the last two years than in the last 5-7, we were stuck in a rut, comfortable in our numb boredom, trudging along in our assigned roles. First the change with myself and my Hubby, we were blessed with an opportuning to move and live in the country. The stars lined up, because even though we were trudging along, we both had a dream that we spoke to each other, and to the universe. We wanted to live in the country, and not be house poor. I wont go into it, but our prayers were answered, almost defying our inactivity to do anything that would seem to bring this about. I truly believe if you send that energy out into the Universe with a desire and passion, it can happen the stars line up, things fall into place, that really shouldnt, but somehow inexplicably do.
I was laid off, from a job I loved last year, like many other people in this economy, I was adrift and down, but I somehow found a job I love better, and fits me better. Who knew. I achieved things this year, by choosing to stop fighting against the tide, I am a fighter by nature, meaning that I grew up and brought up my children, to never let anything keep you down, you always get back up you always fight for yourself, staying down is not an option, but I realized that while this is a good trait, you have to really stand back and look at the situation, and realize that God will provide, if you listen to your heart, and you flow with the tide, and never stop moving forward. I will reflect on this Thanksgiving, and not trying to make it to too many places in too short a time, or wait in lines at the grocery store, I will hold my family near, we will laugh, talk, and cry a little, but we will be Thankful, that everyday is a chance to move forward and make it right, make it better. Sorry so long, I kind of got lost in my self therapy there. Enjoy your holiday, enjoy what matters. Slow down and breathe a minute. Happy Thanksgiving